a Journey

Ahhh... today was a great day of chillin' out. I love my darling. So do. I love Mister Ou Dahui! *grinz* It was great to be able to completely slack off today after rushing projects, essays and presentations, for like the past 3weeks! How sad is my life?! *bleaugh* Y'knw, whoever said I could breathe in Uni was obviously lying. 'Cos I've never worked as hard as I did till Uni! Anyway, my Lama baby honey bunny was so sweet the way he kept insisting that I take today off and not feel guilty about it. With him, I feel like I've grown alot as a person. I never knew I could trust, rely and more importantly love anyone so much other than Yaya till him. He's taught me what it means to open my heart more to love. If it wasn't for him, I'd still be that naive, wannabe pretend 'tough' chick sitting drunk on the swing at Mandarin Gardens. I think, all those times I acted as a 'tough' cynical Phie in front of my gurls, it was 'cos I didn't KNOW what it meant to love. Dating does not equal to knowing what it is like to love. Just like having sex with somebody doesn not mean you are necessarily making love with that person. It's different; similar on the surface but very different as chalk and cheese when you get down to the itty bitty parts. Fir's girl jst asked me what's my take on sex. I told her that sex sure as hell isn't equal to love. I hope she survives the guy that's using her right now. *burp* I've been a glutton today. Ate so much, it's amazin! Even Yaya says I've eaten quite a fair bit today. I know Lama and my gurls hate it when I can just go on whining about the way I look. But to me, oke, so I'm not fat-- I just want to look the best that my body can. Right now, at this point in time, I know that it isn't. So even if I don't look it, I just feel like a blob that is overflowing. *blurb blurb* Eww. And Lama's going soon. I don't want to satrt lookin' good only when he's gone! I mean, yeah, we can do the whole picture & video thingy. But it's nothing like enjoyin' me when he can hold me, see me, touch me! I want him to be able to appreciate me, the best that I can be. Maybe that's why I've been so anal retentive about the whole body thingy. Some periods, my body just looks good on its own. Other times like now, I think it needs major reconstruction! *facelift at work!* Ooh wells, the movie was great! A Series of Unfortunate Events! It's a really warm movie without much of the cliched bit parts of family love and bonding. Jim Carrey wasn't that unbearable tis time around too! In fact, he was quite good playing Count Olaf. Muting his usually "drama mama" acting really makes him come off better... to me at least. I love the part where the parents wrote that as long as you have family, you have home. Very lovely, the way the concept of what home is, is explained so simply. Home is loving and daring to protect and stand up for what and who you love. I know I will stand up for Lama, should anyone dare to insult him. I stood up for him once before as a friend, I'll stand up for him now as his gurlfriend.