a Journey

Turning 20 is a milestone because it means that my teen years are over. Officially. *sigh* I am now a 'young adult'. I prefer adolescence lots more right now. Anyway, Jo was asking me what I wanted to do tis' year. Honestly, I just want to sit somewhere quiet and chill with people who have a special place in my heart. Somewhere cosy, somewhere affordable would be good. I guess I can't possibly have everyone at one same venue and still spend time the way I want to: sit, drink lotsa cuppa tea/coffee, yak like there's no tomorrow about the krazies that have happened and the dreams we hold close & dear.

p.s shopping and pedi/mani would be great as an added bonus. ;)

Today when you called me to tell me about your results, my heart broke. I could hear the pain in your voice; the tears that were threatening to break from that stronghold within, the disappointment and the hurt. I wish that at that point in time, I was in the cafe with you as you received the results. Back in Melbourne with you instead of trying to juggle packed lunches here in Singapore. By your side telling you, that I was proud of you. That I am not worried for you when it comes to skool. Why? Because gurl, I know you can make it. I believe that all you need is time to settle in, and now that you have, you WILL shine in the semester to come. Fay-gurL, you can do so well there in RMIT. I thought so from the very first day I was there with you, and I'm just waiting to be proven right. Look at it this way, you're skipping an entire year of uni and starting at yr3. I honestly have no idea how I can even scrape through if I were to be in the same situation as you! Gurl. Please smile for me. (Otherwise, I seriously think I'd be feeling blue too!) Have faith. Everything happens for a reason and even if we can't see it now, I'm sure the reason will reveal itself in time to come. *hugs*

Last night at Charlie's Corner was really sweet. Fish 'n' chips were fantastic, although Charles and Carlin thought otherwise about the chips. I say, potato wedges would help you accept them homemade chips (broad and flat) better. *giggles* Had Erdinger dark served to me in a tall long glass. It was estimated to be 750ml. *gulps* Oh wells, the boys had Stella Artois and Hoegarden (role reversal! Poor waiter was so confused as to which beer was for who!) ;)Followed by a nice chill out at George's where I learnt this: smoking makes a person s l o w e r. drinking makes me dumber. Was losing at taiti cos I was so high from the Erdinger, then the guys started smoking. Then I started to win. :) ooH, and there was a wee lil' gurl at the pub with her parents. She looked like a little young adult sitting on the bar stool amidst all the um, of age people (age range 16-50s) making a nuisance of ourselves! She was one of the rare few dignified ones in the pub when we left at closing time. *blushes* I think she's only 9 years old at most and she was such a Miss! She was sitting there playing dice with her dad, making song dedications and surveying the scene of intoxicated pub crawlers every once in awhile. Pity I was too sloshed to get a picture with her. Charles had a great night (just smile! stop trying to hide the smile!) too with his lil' Missy too who he's been trying to get for the past week or so. Anyway, Bedok Simpang's roti prata's really good with milo-peng. ;)
So basically it was getting fed, fat and high all in a matter of a few hours.

An indulgent, slovenly night of -drinking-getting high-feasting-

I took a walk down memory lane today when I walked past the ol' playground Fay and I used to visit on the way to the MP library. The swings are gone, but I could still picture the two of us then in our TK uniforms. She so tiny and small, me the bigger one skirt billowing as I swung as hard as I could with the swing creaking dangerously beneath my weight. Secondary school days were lovely because it seemed then, that our future lay before us bright and so full of unknown potential. We were young, happy and hopeful. Now, I daresay we're happy. But it's different from the girlish giggly happy. I guess, my happy now is bittersweet. It's the bitterness of having experienced lessons of life swirled together with the beauty that life still manages to hold for you.

I guess you can say my bitter comes from realising that life does cut deep sometimes; but the beauty lies in those who step forward and try to mend me. So much so that the scar becomes a reminder of the love that I have, instead of the pain I went through. I smile back on my scars, because I remember how those around me helped mend a broken me back. The pain only made the sweet better.

My Christmas pressie will be touching down on the 20th of Dec, my CNY ang pao will be touching down on the 17th of Jan *fingers crossed* My lifesaver will be leaving for Melbourne for good (noO!) around that time.

I guess people will always be coming and going. It hurts but I guess like Jo said, at least I'll always have my gurls. So maybe I can't have all of them here with me, but at least I can smile knowing that I love and I am loved. To all you dearies, take care & God bless till we meet again!

This is what I owe:

Fir:: Ben 'n' Jerry ice cream outing followed by choc buffeT!::

dear sweet Fay::ur christmas & birthday treats shall be rolled into a woof-ful (*hint hint*) one::

Lama dah-ling::my undivided attention::

Ern:: Christmas play help?::

Aunty Kat & cuzs::gurls' nite out::

Parents::trip up to Melaka::

Brothers::pampering treats::

Yaya::her well-deserved pressie::

p.s. they're not in order of importance!!

Anyway, Jumbo Seafood at East Coat rawks my tummy! (variation of a line I know ;) ) The Sri Lankan crabs there are succulently delicious! Steamed * Peppered * Chillified * take your pick, but I'm pretty sure like me, you'll walk/roll away a happy full gurl. Drunken prawns in sweet warming soup with chinese wine, white button scallops on yam rings, seafood mee goreng with generous portions of sweet sauce, prawns, fish and sotong. *rubs rotund tummy* It was such a lovely indulgence, with me trying to play adult. I was the only kiddo amongst all the older (think 50's) adults. But I guess the dinner really helped ease any discomfort. Washed down with oolong tea... yummY! :)

Christmas rolls around

to wrap up the events which we have experienced

and to bring closure to the lessons we have learnt.

As the familiar raindrops make their way down the panes,

I hold my hot mug of comfort close,

remembering my gratefulness

for the hope of Christmas.

With Christmas, somehow, I'm happy

thinking of all the potential that lies before

untouched and untapped....

a fountain of warmth & love that could be

if only we make the effort to try.

And try I will.

shopping around MP today, I realize...

I miss MeLbourne shopping!

or rather, I miss the surf shops at TorquaY!

LURVE the stuff they have there!

It's so amazing! So LURVELY!

Tried to relive those times by shopping online...

and ROXY did not fail me!

and Papillio also made me smile.

Anyway

this is what I have learnt from dinner with Wyn & Seth:

do NOT bring guys to Delifrance for dinner,

and expect them to be filled.

trust me, they WILL still be hungry.

we had dinner, followed by a 3rd and 4th one

at the cheaper and more filling hawker centre afterwards.

I have learnt my lesson well.

this is what made me LOL (yesterday and today):

a well-known actor in the H.K scene

on the acting breakthroughs he's had

now that he has turned 40.

(1) he went without makeup during filming.

(2) he allowed the director to ruffle his eyebrows.

(3) he's willing to bare his butt or all of his back

if the director asks him to.

*pats tummy* *sighs*

I practically forced Roy to write out a

'look good' plan for me.

on the plan he said exercise (running)

and eat right (no chips and oreos).

so I tried to follow his plan. handwritten at that.

I stayed off chips and oreos

and had waffles -large- instead.

I ran for the bus instead of walking as usual...

and missing it.

does that count? *fingers crossed*

puh-lease let it count towards something.

anyway. Gelare's waffles make me happy

when I'm eating it. But right now.

I think I'm suffering from delayed brain freeze.

This is my punishment for being greedy

and eating Fir's share too.

*rubs tummy* *sighs*

Maybe, I should NOT meet the blokes

for rounds at the pub tis Fri

before Zouk.

Maybe. Maybe. Maybe.

I need open space.

An open space away from the world, from people.

sometimes, I feel so suffocated

so overwhelmed by the sheer amount of peeps,

squeezed into the wee lil' area we call orchard.

It's amazing how all I see

are masses of blacks spots

when I'm standing in an elevated position looking down.

I guess everyone needs a break.

from people. from the madness we call life.

Dec can't roll around soon enuf.

*dreams blissful dreams*

coming back to reality...

actually...

THURS can't roll around soon enough.

Waffles & Cream with Fir

-smiles-

Zouk with dearies on Fri

-happy-

When will my exams end?!

interesting how caffeinne addiction creeps up on you.

studying just now, I thot it was my notes driving me krazy.

so I decided to take a walk, and was Immediately hit

by a coffee dearth migraine.

I've had my fair share, so I'm quite good at recognizing them.

*sigh* gave in...

had my instant kopi...

became very productive & chirpy.

my 2 newest recruits to coffee anon. are

ShaL & RacH

" I can't study without coffee."

"Phie, I want to drink coffee."

"Do they have coffee here?"

I rest my case.

this is what studying at Starbucks does to you.

it converts you. *evil smile*

slowly but surely, before you know it,

you're hooked.

Just like how Shal was converted on mocha,

so was Rach.

-Mocha- choc & coffee - brillance in a cup.

Christmas is 'round the corner,

and I lurve my Starbucks even more so now.

warm wood, soft glow, deep red deocrations...

tis is what makes my studying in the day bearable.

I'm dreaming of a pretty Christmas,

hoping & crossing my toes n fingers

my Dearies can return home to me.

otherwise, I'll take comfort in...

-pretty tumblers-

-flamingoes-

-shopping-

but they're nowhere close,

as having my dearies home for Christmas.