a Journey

Love, is an action-- we feel love because of what we do for others, and we in turn feel loved because of what others do for us.

Why do we love? I wish I knew.

In some ways, I love for shallow causes, much like most Hollywood movies portray: 

I've loved because he's 'oh-so-hot' and I liked the ego boost of being noticed and wooed out of all the possible choices he had. I've loved because I want to feel better than the rest. I've loved because I like the feeling of being loved; the pampering really isn't that hard to get accustomed to. I've loved because it is convenient to and it would mean more company anyway.

I've loved for all those reasons.

And yet, I've also loved, without wanting anything in return for myself. I've loved because I met people who touched me with love so great and almost unconditional, I couldn't help but love them back. I've loved, wishing and trying my best to give all that I could, just so I could give happiness, no matter how brief a time. I have put my heart on the line, knowing I could get hurt, but still chose to love.

I've loved for these reasons. And I want to love more this way.

*sigh*

So many times I tell myself that everyone's as worthy as the next person. But last night, I've learnt that in the face of rudeness, love and so many other noble things just gets flushed down the chute.

Rudeness and respect: they are anti-thesis of each other. How can I learn to respect those who are rude to me? I am a firm believer that respect must be earned, and is never given without trial. I really wished that I could find a way in me to respect those who're nonchalant and flippant about their behaviour towards others. The sheer rudeness, for the fact that I don't react. That I choose not to react.

It will be tough. But I believe in doing to others what I want others to do to me. Even if they don't end up treating me with the same respect, I will not fall to their level of rudeness and masquerade it as civil, excusable behaviour. I will not fall. Even if it means forcing myself to act respectfully, I will do so, simply because "my mama taught me better than that." (Kudos to Destiny's Child)